June... you're supposed to offer more than this.

It's already June. 

June is supposed to be a great month for closing the books, soaking up more sunshine, tending to seasonal yard clean up and gardening, basically just getting outdoors more often, especially to the water's edge to breathe in the sea air and recover from life's busyness. 

The weather lately though, doesn't seem to understand it's June. Some days have already been way too hot and horribly humid, resulting in sudden debilitating breathing issues. On other days, I'm running for my winter coat again. Crazy! 

June is supposed to be the month for slipping happily toward a summer mode for the months ahead. That's just not happening either. On top of weather issues, we've entered a timing for mental gymnastics with tug of war challenges, a push/shove overwhelming effort at times with health, and the uncomfortable feeling of being sucked dry in the process. I'm not enjoying the entire idea of spending this summer burned out, bummed out, and dusting myself off from being hammered to the ground.

I know for sure, it's tremendously difficult to even admit it, but I just can't seem to get the desire to wrap my head around those small calendar squares ahead, at least not yet. 

Instead, I've been mentally turning the monthly calendar pages over, remembering the little stuff to do, like make those dental and optometrist appointments for everyone, check the well water all three weeks in a row, freshen up a few rooms with a coat of paint, enjoy hobby and down time galore, and eagerly prepare to welcome out of town guests for the wedding ahead. The whole idea of having all eight of our children staying under our roof all together again is very exciting!

I'm convinced the year though is flying by way too quickly. We're battling mosquitoes later than usual, the ones that do damage while sucking on my husband's face in the night. I'm still hoping and praying this long standing sinus dryness and pain finally disappears for good, and wondering where my hubby's health issues are heading with two very poor overall stat drops. I'm wanting to close the school books for an overdue brain dump soon, just finding myself simply counting down our days, realizing too that in a mere few weeks, fall will already appear once again, and this upcoming summer will vanish forever. Now, that's just an awful thought. 

June. Please come to stay. Please offer us steady weather, a fitting month filled with refreshment to come. Please? 

Yesterday, I was able to get out for my usual hike with my ladies. I haven't been for a while, usually due to the poor weather and subsequent necessary hike cancellations. Those times like the past three weeks due to thunder, lightning, tornado threats and monsoon rains.  

When hustling to get out the door to meet the start timing this week, I almost returned inside and slammed it shut behind me. The skies opened up, and suddenly without warning, the rain came down, swiftly pelting the ground with its heaviness. 

Quickly, I grabbed my rain jacket while muttering frustrations to myself under my breath. The immense urge to get out and move was (for me) far greater than the inconvenience of getting wet, so in a split second, I was back out the door and driving out toward my destination. 

I'm so glad I did. Ten minutes later, the rain ceased as I entered our hiking area to join everyone else gathering there. We weren't canceled!

Halfway around our 7.7 km. hike, the sun briefly appeared. Walking at a fast clip, very soon we all tore our jackets off, and my body began thanking me for keeping pace in my usual spot at the head of the pack. 

Every footstep enabled me to pound my heavy heart of late into my forward action steps, and our group's conversations allowed for a lovely and spontaneous bunch of laughter, its lighter content welcomed into my already full head. 

 

As usual, our hike leader's choice of this day's natural environment offered an instant peaceful tranquility for our often fast paced cardio movements, even when that one steep gully grunt climb left me almost breathless along with the others for a few seconds. Cheering one another onward, no one allowed to stop, it all quickly ended up feeling so, so, so good! Yes, it did! 

It's been a season for me of; "Oh sure, I can do that", or "Okay, I'll help", or "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, and more yesses".... so much giving, many times without so much as a thank you. Energy depleted, stupid me (!) as I tend to just keep on giving so much of myself. It comes disguised as something sacrificial at times. It does. I've even joked with my children on chaotic days to remember to write on my tombstone, something so simple as "She tried...".  

Seriously though, I've just so often found myself hoping that I can extend my hand, to help alleviate and respond to other's pressures, befriend and soothe a hurting soul, automatically trying to assist family, friends, and neighbors, realizing it's often been to the point of what Elizabeth wrote about yesterday, a lack of "self care". Yes, that's me, my hand is currently raised way up high, pointed to the dark rainy skies above... I truly have spent the past few months placing everyone's needs way ahead of my own. 

I've had to actually sit back and take a moment to figure out; "Wait a second, what is it that I really need myself right now?"

 

Eventually while out hiking, I realized a glorious adrenaline energy had sneaked in and washed over me. Thankful and happy tears welled up in my eyes for believing strongly enough that - rain or shine, this hike just HAD to be mine. I had to own it, determined to begin and then to absolutely complete it, to get through the rain and storms in my mind let alone outdoors, then to find the joy dancing inside my heart after congratulating myself, and wiping the sweat off my tomato red, overheated face at the end of it all.   

Encouraging, I loved finding my husband's text come in a bit later; "You went for your hike after all! Good for you!"

A few of us decided upon a hot beverage location, and while unwinding with my pleasant camaraderie over a cup of hot of tea, everything again felt more focused and right with my soul. 

June. Hard to believe you are actually already here.... It's been such a rough winter, and spring.
 

June... I pledge to you now, as well as to the upcoming months of July and August, that I will take way more time for "self care", to deflect all the life sucking issues being thrust forward towards me these days, to offer them all upward, and "I will" begin to find the courage and strength to use that two letter word - "No"

No, not today. No, sorry I can't. No, outside of my own vocational duties, I'm trying to take these months ahead while knee deep in wedding plans, to begin taking better care of myself, and until such a time as I feel rested, recovered, and at peace in my heart, I'm just not able to tack on many additional items at this time that could possibly take me away from this very necessary personal goal. 

I must get out for my daily walk, to my exercise class, for my weekly hike, keep checking in with my chiropractor for those headaches which have returned, have leisurely dates with my husband and family times in between. There is much to pray for, a roaring to-do list yet unchecked, plenty of activities in full swing, and portfolios to complete.

Nope, not today, but for today, I will think of my own (and that of my family's) health and mental welfare, being extra careful not to volunteer to change my plans as I am usually caught doing, those which tend to affect me in keeping that promise to myself this summer.  

Oh, and dear June, July and August.... I will never miss another hike again! 

You.Are.Mine.... 

I promise.

 P.S. I am having a plethora of trouble with my blog, so many errors upon posting, not tracking properly in readers anymore, and I'm too annoyed to try to figure it out anymore at this point in time. There's the reason for my absence, and when I'm able, I plan to get to the bottom of all of that. Eventually. When it fits life here. Meanwhile, I have a "Ten Things I'm Thankful For" post coming up shortly...

Ten Things I'm Thankful For ~ Early Fall rewind...

Ten things seems so small, so frivolous in the grand scheme of life. 

It's been interesting hearing from friends recently, sharing how tough it's been to find up to ten things to be thankful for this time of year, crashing after all the feasting and festivities from the past month or more.

Heh, I have news for you!

If there are crushing clouds blinding your vision at this time of year, take heart, and go backwards. Yes, rewind to a calmer time, when life was peaceful in your home and heart, when thoughts of thanksgiving were plentiful, and a smile graced your face each day.

Think of ten from a while back, just ten, and that will be enough for you today. Maybe write them down for a splendid visual reminder, cherish each vivid memory of a better time for you, and let your heart sing!

I'm cheering for you. Let me know how you do.

Hugs;

Renee

Here's my ten things from a rewind of months past, as a continuation of a past blog promise.

- 1 - I'm thankful for fields of bright fields of yellow canola beans, located throughout our province of Ontario.These gloriously bright yellow blooms make me smile, every time I pass by a full field of them shortly before harvest time.

I'm fairly sure I've posted photos of canola fields before here, but as I sit here yet again gazing at this particular photo, the one where I found so breathtakingly beautiful, the urge to pull over and snap this photo was an urgent desire. I am still smiling over how beautiful the landscape was in the lovely drive-by find this day. 

- 2 - I'm thankful for great big delicious blueberries from British Columbia, our former home province! 

We are thrilled to know summertime in Ontario includes the world's best imported blueberries, found locally at both Costco, and our grocery stores. 

There's nothing quite so fine as a heaping bowl of these rich antioxidant fruits first thing in the morning. Yum! 

 - 3 - I'm thankful for the barnyard beehive of activity for our girls all summer long, in the wee hours of the morning before heading to a horse show, during a day-long summer camp helper/rider week, or at dusk when the skies wink to those below, tucking horses away and cleaning up for yet another night. 

What a great place for young ladies to be able to hang out with their beastly horse pals.

 - 4 - I'm thankful for an adult son who had to remain behind due to work commitments, when the rest of the family traveled west. He offered to tend to the home front, and ensure this mother that her flowers would remain watered. 

Yes, he could attest to watering all florals, and gardens while we were gone, at least he says he did so.....(confession time) - "when he remembered". 

Honest efforts have a pay off in the end, as a mother forgives losing her many summer plants and florals when an admission comes from the heart, that it wasn't an easy task to complete the watering on a daily basis, both in summer's very high heat, and trying to cope with balancing shift work and sleep. 

Thank you for trying son. I'm sure happy you were able to complete the task as best you can, when able. And besides, it's fairly simple to slip the planter bucket out of my cast iron urns, and slip in another to replace it when the first one dies...like I ended up doing later on. xox

 - 5 - I'm thankful for the popularity of "beaver tails" around these parts, whole businesses dedicated to maintaining their good reputations. Like the summertime "fry guys", these are associated with providing a rare, traditional summer treat that make my children smile, and show gratitude for being able to try another upon occasion.

Our kids are specially fond of the ones made by melting peanut butter and chocolate over top, and then sprinkling them with a few mini reeses pieces bits, all atop of  warmly heated pastry bottoms. Sounds so rich doesn't it? It is. It's a treat, meant to share, and everyone appreciates their summer revisit "tasting" for this dessert fare. 

- 6 - I'm thankful for dear friends who have been so thoughtful towards our youngest grandbaby, sending along love packages sealed with kisses and hugs.  

These adorable summer outfits graced our little missie during our high summer temperatures, and she looked so sweet and cuddly wearing them. Thank you again K. xox

 - 7 - I'm thankful for warm, early fall evenings when ice hockey beginnings offer longer sunlight evenings, though this year's Midget division plays later and it becomes dark by ice time's ending. 

Being a hockey dad to four boys, this one the youngest of them all, my husband still very much enjoys the promise of a new hockey season.

 

Without the NHL this year, we've all been enjoying our son's hockey games, our local OHL team's great winning lead in their divisional play, and the worldwide Junior hockey games, in the wee hours of the morning on television . 

 

I hope you too have been out supporting the little guys this year. Why not... for they too can offer great hockey at a fraction of the cost, if not for free.

 

 - 8 - I'm thankful for our continual efforts and strong desires to get out and observe nature in its truest form, season to season, with our young naturalist group, or on our own, only to keep discovering new (cool) things. 

This was one of my finds while out participating in a morning hike with my lady friends. I was delighted to have a show and tell from one of our naturalist savvy guides, the one who encouraged all of us to pull one out, open it up and discover the silk within this common milkweed Asclepias syriaca pod. 

There was an abundance of them growing wild along our hiking trails. I'm pleased that we stopped to (smell the roses) observe these. 

I was able to easily crack mine open and noticed the milky substance quickly running down my hand. We all remarked on the delicate seeds and soft silky material curled up inside. It's no wonder butterflies and bees are attracted to these plants. 

Interesting facts about this perenial herb; 

"In World War II, schoolchildren across the Midwest collected thousands of pounds of milkweed fluff to stuff life preservers for the armed forces in the Pacific, because kapok, the normal material used for this purpose, came from Japanese-occupied Indonesia and was unavailable. Today, you can buy pillows, jackets, and comforters stuffed with this material, which is wonderfully soft and has a higher insulative value than goose down, from a company called Ogallala Down, in Ogallala, Nebraska. Some people believe that milkweed will become an important fiber crop, as one of its attributes is that it is perennial and therefore does not need to be replanted every year. Milkweed stalks also produce a coarse, sisal-like fiber that can be used for twine, which varies in strength from one plant to the next. This possibility has been little explored commercially, but it was well known to Native Americans."

- 9 - I'm thankful for September, and even October beach days, where the water's edge is most definitely still the best place to be on a warm fall day.  

Everyone loves an afternoon, or early evening break from the usual routines of the day, when walking the shore and keeping it simple please all human senses, where the fresh air and breezes from the water's beyond, seem to carry us into another realm of time and space. None here ever tire of these precious days at the water's edge of summer's end, and none, once settled in, are in any hurry to leave. 

 

- 10 - I'm thankful for friends who humor me, and keep me laughing. This friend was running late in getting her daughter to the barn for horse riding lessons this night. With food in hand, everyone from a distance noticed her nutritious and most colorful salad. 

I could sense everyone suddenly salivating from the freshness on that plate, until she got closer and then I began to giggle. 

Freshness included fruits and veggies alright, but not everyone noticed what I saw from my angle. This friend likes her sweets you see, maybe you've already noticed the m&ms and the handful of trail mix thrown to one side? 

What a great salad huh?   

And here again are a list highlighting "ten things" in a rewind mode once more. As we are in the dead of winter here, just browsing through these photos above made me think of bare feet in the sand, sunset evenings, fresh summer's produce, sweet friends, warm memories, and nature's blessings in every season. 

Maybe allow yourself a stroll through your photo archives to a warmer time, and think of ten things yourself today that have blessed you abundantly. 

Have a great day everyone!

An autumn forest hike

“After a day's walk everything has twice its usual value.”  

~ George Macauley Trevelyan

The best thing I've ever done this past year is join a hiking group. There are upwards of 20 women who walk or hike weekly together, an amazing assortment of ages and abilities to be sure. Actually, the bulk of these women are in fabulous condition, never "walk" per se, rather "power walk" at a great clip to keep anyone else moving hard just to keep up with them. 

I myself like to be in the lead, either right at the helm with our group's organizer, or just behind. I find this keeps me accountable, and really moving to keep up. It's a healthy feeling to become so naturally adrenalized, even if the ridiculous sweating that happens is rather unbecoming. 

The scenery during each of our walk/hikes has been utterly breathtaking at times, most of the geographical hike explorations have been new to me. So far, we've been along beach shores, lush and thick forest paths, along the Nine Mile Portage, through historical Fort road beds, and along snowy walkways on snowshoe. It's always a little bonus when spotting those secret geocatching locations along our journeys.

I love this group of friendly and motivating gals, and find it so encouraging myself, to be in a position of cheering on new members, who are at times very out of shape but very darned and determined to perk up again. The ladies keep up their paces well, so everyone knows if they can't keep up, linger behind with a buddy and see you at the end.

These photos were snapped last week, during a sunny autumn morning deep within the Copeland Forest. 

Surprisingly while we were houghing up steeper hills, a few joggers came along and ran by us so quickly, we literally felt the silent wind beneath their leafy feet in stunned surprise. 

Also surprising was finding out the pedometer clicked us in at 9,879 steps during this particular hike. Yay! Great workout!   

"If adventure has a final and all-embracing motive, it is surely this: we go out because it is our nature to go out, to climb mountains, and to paddle rivers, to fly to the planets and plunge into the depths of the oceans... When man ceases to do these things, he is no longer man."  

- - Wilfrid Noyce

 

  “If you are seeking creative ideas, go out walking.  

Angels whisper to a man when he goes for a walk.”     

-- Raymond Inmon


  

 “A vigorous five-mile walk will do more good for an unhappy but otherwise healthy adult than all the medicine and psychology in the world.” 
 

-- Paul Dudley White


  

“Thoughts come clearly while one walks.”  
 

-- Thomas Mann


  

 Some of the 20 ladies in my hiking club.

 “The longest journey begins with a single step, not with a turn of the ignition key.  That's the best thing about a walking, the journey itself.  It doesn't much matter whether you get where your going or not.  You'll get there anyway.  Every good hike brings you eventually back home.  Right were you started.”

 

-- Edward Abbey 

"We don't stop hiking because we grow old - 

we grow old because we stop hiking". 

 

-Finis Mitchell

 

 

“We live in a fast-paced society.  

Walking slows us down.”  
 

-- Robert Sweetgall