To everything there is a season, part two

My "word of the year" has been "courage" for many reasons. 

Little did I ever suspect how courageous I would be called upon to live, to step up to the plate and walk many times, solely and shockingly by trust and faith. These are the times when the ripple effect makes us feel like nothing makes any sense. Over time though, we hope all will be gently revealed to us.

 It has been my most fervent prayer this past year, secretly aiming to hold near and try to mend hearts, (even literally, if just my very own), in all stages of nurturing, love, shock, disappointment, support, grief, confusion, brokenness, counsel, and amidst the dreaded moments of misunderstanding.

There have been so many terrible illnesses, and many precious events, even some tragic, and untimely deaths are unyielding, and continue to surround us in 2012.

A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak

It seems so much grief has come to call, and some days just finding the strength to offer support to others has lifted us up each and every time when we find ourselves reaching out, and becoming more useful whenever possible.

Like a deeply grieving dear friend recently publicly declared; "there wasn't meant to be a pause button in life", so we must continue to trust God's plan for our lives, even when painful hearts may overcome our human natures, just one baby step at a time. 

We as mere mortal humans tend to often pray during tough times for the gift of even more fortitude, followed by hope for all future things to come, when we're finally ready to begin trusting again in God's plan for our lives, remembering too that the "Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away".

In the blink of an eye, our lives as we know it can drastically change, and yet, they can be completely transformed with newness and unexpected beauty; the joy of a smile, and kind hearts shared.

A time to be born, and a time to die

 

• Remembering those tiny three month old wee baby fingers and the coo of her voice.

• Seeking a fresh visual memory of that sweet teenage girl's big smile, before the pain in her heart left her unable to remain on this earth any longer.  I'm very much feeling her mommy's heart ache day to day with her baby girl passed from her. 

• Wondering how tough it must be for our friends, to have a gaping hole when a grandson/son is no longer present within his own family, dying in a tragic accident along with his best friend. 

• Picking up the telephone to make a phone call, then remembering the loved one is no longer there to answer it. 

• Several phone calls come in the middle of the night, they say doctors suspect a stroke.

• An Uncle continues with radiation and deals with his diagnosis of brain cancer.

• A cousin has been suffering again, and though the bone marrow transplant helped, he's sliding once more. 

• The hospital situation leaves us wondering if a parent will ever be able to return home again, nursing there now since May. Pneumonia and sepsis had been the recent diagnosis, after he had already climbed from Cdifficile twice. He's so very weak and can't possibly return home this way.

• Of course, right here at home, the continued threatening presence of a lingering xenopi bacteria, a non contagious form of Tuberculosis, somewhat dormant for now in the scar tissue of my husband's threatening deteriorating lungs from a rare disease.    

LORD, HAVE MERCY!

Oh yes, and above all things, we will definitely be judged for our hearts, and for how we have feathered or bristled our relationships. 

The fall out can wreak havoc, or it can offer immense blessings. We can choose which we prefer simply by our actions.     

It's; "a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance."

Sometimes we can create such a longing to be fruitful in some sort of way, and yet other times I find myself a baby pupil in this game of life, still learning that there are times when there is simply nothing I can offer, and nothing I can do. How frustrating is that?

I have been wringing my hands together now for over a year, so shockingly and often suddenly called to prayer, wondering if this will be the one, or the next will somehow break the camel's back.

The soft yelp that occurs while falling to my knees, sends me deep and beyond when begging for a sweet surrender, or ultimate heavenly word of comfort, either personally for me to grab on to, or to be able to somehow offer to another.

Trust and Pray

At times, I've sat wondering what will fall into my lap path next, darting about looking for a white flag to hoist in the air, futile attempts for a time out, for a hoped surrender, yet at the same time, I'm trying to remain cautiously optimistic.

I always find myself hoping God will reveal His plan for the monstrous, even bigger picture as each increased amount of anxiety and body jolting shock creates a further heavy heart which tends to become a momentarily bizarre way of life.

"Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful". 

~ John 14:27

Or, like I've been told by so many, keep my eyes on the promised words, because we can choose not to allow it to consume us.

Please join me in prayerfully gazing at Ecclesiastes 3:1, for there lay a whole host of possible blog posts during our many difficult or memorable seasons of life.

Celebrate with me how we are expected to live, to cope, and to be ever mindful of the presence of God's will in our lives.

A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

Lastly, I want to pass along the best piece of advice ever.

My suffering friend's 96 year old Aunt offered this advice;

"Don't Ask Why"

Yes, bad things really do happen to good people.

That is how life really displays itself in our midst. We wonder about it all, try to navigate our own ways through stormy seas, but at the end of the day, life is what we make of it, how we accept what comes our way, and truly, what is imprinted and contained in our hearts.

A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away

Please join me my friends, that we may have faith like the mustard seed, and to have courage that our lives be "well lived".

May we truly believe that each of our days has already been ordained for us, all when HE already knew the number of hairs on our head, while still deeply comfortable within our mother's womb.

Ecclesiastes 3:1

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

What profit hath he that worketh in that wherein he laboureth?

 I have seen the travail, which God hath given to the sons of men to be exercised in it.

He hath made every thing beautiful in his time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end.

I know that there is no good in them, but for a man to rejoice, and to do good in his life.

And also that every man should eat and drink, and enjoy the good of all his labour, it is the gift of God.

I know that, whatsoever God doeth, it shall be for ever: nothing can be put to it, nor any thing taken from it: and God doeth it, that men should fear before him.

That which hath been is now; and that which is to be hath already been; and God requireth that which is past.

And moreover I saw under the sun the place of judgment, that wickedness was there; and the place of righteousness, that iniquity was there.

I said in mine heart, God shall judge the righteous and the wicked: for there is a time there for every purpose and for every work.

I said in mine heart concerning the estate of the sons of men, that God might manifest them, and that they might see that they themselves are beasts.

For that which befalleth the sons of men befalleth beasts; even one thing befalleth them: as the one dieth, so dieth the other; yea, they have all one breath; so that a man hath no preeminence above a beast: for all is vanity.

All go unto one place; all are of the dust, and all turn to dust again.

Who knoweth the spirit of man that goeth upward, and the spirit of the beast that goeth downward to the earth?

Wherefore I perceive that there is nothing better, than that a man should rejoice in his own works; for that is his portion: for who shall bring him to see what shall be after him?

Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon them.

May the souls of the faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace.

Amen.